Stuck In The Middle With Ugh

This is me plotting the coup d’Etat of the century.  stillhere

No, not really. Basically, I was just chilling on my terrace (in case this wasn’t made obvious based on my Homebase throne).

I was indeed minding my own business, checking the lighting on this terrace [and plotting my next blog posts], when the neanderthals from downstairs reared their prehistoric behinds from their ground floor lair. They didn’t just rear their heads, they rolled their necks faster than Gollum at the sight of its precious.

This evening’s griefs?

Apparently,  I should think about learning levitation skills, and cannot be walking on my own terrace at 9PM, because it is 9PM and we cannot be walking at 9PM. Upon my response that I have two feet and not two wings (not yet), the City Cromagnons countered that it is 9PM and we SIMPLY CANNOT WALK AT 9PM!!!


“I’m walking on sunshine (Wo-oh!)
I’m walking on sunshine (Wo-oh!)
I’m walking on sunshine (Wo-oh!)
And don’t it feel good!!”

No, real answer:

UUUGH! Geddafookattaherewithdatboolsheet!

First of all, the only thing that is going to physically levitate tonight is my digitus medius.

Approved by Jesus Christus.


Secondly, I have decided that I will indeed learn levitation – from the best “levitate-my-foot-in your-face” master : Dhalsim from Street Fighter.


Thirdly, (fuck it, I am not even going to attempt writing in Her Majesty’s lingo at that time of the night), my so far polite responses [“Soz I don’t believe I can fly”], will now turn into a stream of verbal pyromania more active than mount Vesuvius.


Try me.


Fourthly, (yeah I know), I would actually like to thank these cranky moffos, for they have motivated me to also take up yoga, zumba and blahblahblah dancing [Customary French Dance: Talk on the phone and pace to the beat of the conversation whilst waving hands at the mention of ‘BlahBlahBlah’].



On this note, I shall be back tomorrow, resuming online shenanigans 🙂

Good night !

Me, leaving to my bedroom ↓


Lifestyle London Random Rant

5 Comments Leave a comment

  1. hahaha
    I love ~they rolled their necks faster than Gollum at the sight of its precious”

    Looks like learning how to levitate will do some wonders :P.

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